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Henry's Pay-Per-View Reviews: WWF Royal Rumble 2000

 We now enter a new millennium in my pay-per-view reviews, as the WWF enters 2000 with all the momentum in the world. 1999 was a rough year for WCW, and business would continue to fall off a cliff for Billionaire Ted while Vince McMahon slowly took over the wrestling world. This is far and away the best year in WWE history, both in terms of business and on-screen product, producing consistently entertaining episodes of Raw and SmackDown, plus an incredible output of top quality pay-per-views. It all begins here at the Royal Rumble, a show notable for the antics of Jeff Hardy, the debut of Tazz and one of the greatest hardcore matches in wrestling history. 





- Royal Rumble 2000 comes to you from the historic Madison Square Garden, which is always my favorite host for any WWE show. As you can see on the poster, the company is now using the "Road to WrestleMania" phrase and I believe this year is it's debut, though the team of Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler don't use it at all throughout the show. 


- The show gets off to one heck of a start with the WWF debut of Tazz, whose arrival had been hyped in the weeks leading up to this event and the crowd is ready for it, chanting his name before he even enters. He's answering the open challenge of Kurt Angle, who just debuted a few months prior and is still a little green at this point, though he would develop quickly throughout the year. There's not much to talk about with this match, both men exchange some suplexes before Tazz is able to lock in the Tazzmission and Angle passes out. I thought this was an okay opening act for the "Human Suplex Machine", who looked good tossing Kurt around the ring and on the floor. His presentation does leave a lot to be desired, as he's supposed to be viewed as an absolute monster, but his intense in-ring style is undercut by his lack of height. They really should've shot him in a different way to most of the rest of the roster to cover that detail up, but instead he unfortunately just looks like a bit of a jobber. Even though he did get the win, this is obvious early warning sign that Tazz's WWF career might not go the way everyone was expecting. 


- It's time for the first ever tag team tables match, as the Hardy Boyz take on the Dudley Boyz. The crowd wasn't really certain what they were in for here, but it's safe to say this was a smashing success for the new gimmick. Jeff and Matt eliminate Bubba early with their leg drop/splash combo, though he's allowed to just keep competing, which was strange and seems unfair. Jeff and Matt awe the crowd by crashing through the tables, before the fans go absolutely nuts for Bubba putting Matt through a table with a damn powerbomb off the top rope. Then we get one of the most famous moves in wrestling history, as after Bubba falls off the balcony through another table, Jeff hits an insane Swanton Bomb on D-Von through one more table to end it. This is absolute carnage that just stunned everyone in attendance, featuring tons of head chair shots and lots of broken tables, exactly what you'd expect out of these guys. Even though I don't like the really brutal stuff, this was a highly entertaining match. It's not quite as memorable as what the two teams would be involved in during the years to come, but it's still great, and would've been a much bigger highlight on the show if they hadn't been topped by what was to come later in the night. 


- The next "match" was the Miss Rumble Swimsuit Contest, the one made famous by Mae Young exposing her bare breasts. There can be no debate that this is a thing that happened. 


- Chyna and Chris Jericho have been tied up in a co-champions storyline involving the Intercontinental Championship, one that Jericho is on record as hating. They face off with Hardcore Holly in a triple threat match to determine an undisputed champion, and this match makes Chyna's limitations very obvious. It's unfortunate, because I do like her, but she just can't work and doesn't seem to have put much effort into trying to improve her craft now that she's in a bigger spotlight. Jericho is the obvious star here and gets a big pop for putting Holly in the Walls of Jericho, scoring the win when he lays Chyna out with a running bulldog and the Lionsault. Bigger things were to come for Chris, thankfully, as this storyline could've easily sunk a less entertaining talent. 


- D-Generation X fell apart after Triple H joined the Corporation last year, but he's now put the group back together again as heels. Despite that, Road Dogg and Billy Gunn still do their signature entrance, which is very odd. They're defending the tag titles here against the Acolytes, and most of the match sees Bradshaw and Faarooq just dominate with power moves. X-Pac interferes, and that allows Gunn to pin Bradshaw with the Famasser after just two and a half minutes. Nothing much to say about this one. 


- That last match was likely as short as it was because of what was to follow, a Street Fight between Triple H and Cactus Jack for the WWF title. This one was set up by one of Mick Foley's best promos ever, where he shed his Mankind guise and took the role of Cactus as Hunter sh** his pants. This match is booked very differently to most of Foley's matches as Mankind, where he tended to do a lot of selling and his offense was extremely comedic. But Cactus Jack is a different kind of being, and he's on offense for most of this absolutely brutal affair. Jack opens Triple H up with a barbed wire 2x4, and just keeps driving it into the champion's head as the crowd goes wild. This includes an effing bulldog onto the wire, and big props to Triple H for taking that one, that looked nasty. In a great callback to the previous year, Triple H is able to handcuff Jack, but even still, Cactus will not be denied, hitting the champion with a drop toe hold onto the steel steps. The Rock has some slight involvement here, hitting Triple H with a chair and bringing in a police officer to free the challenger, doing just enough to get his pop and even the odds, but not detracting from the story told between the two competitors. Hunter takes a piledriver on the announce table, but fights back by back dropping Jack onto a pile of thumbtacks, another gnarly spot. A Pedigree isn't enough to put Jack down, and the crowd roars in approval, breaking out into "Foley" chants as Triple H is legitimately shocked. Apparently, that was intended to be the finish, but Mick had something else in mind. He changes the finish on the fly, having Triple H hit another Pedigree, this time onto the tacks, holy sh**, to finally end this carnage. What a war, what a match, this is definitely my favorite hardcore match ever and my favorite match of both guy's careers. They tore each other apart and both look like valiant, sadistic warriors. Obviously, you knew Mick would be willing to do whatever it took to make a match like this great, but Triple H had never really gone through something like this in his career, and still did it anyway. Even more impressive is that although this match looked insanely dangerous, nothing they did really put their own health into too much risk, no real crazy bumps and only a couple chair shots. Mick changing the finish shows just how much he gets wrestling. Kicking out of that first Pedigree made Cactus Jack look damn near unbeatable and got him massively over, while Triple looks like a complete killer for being willing to hit the second one on the tacks, a heel you can both respect and fear. This was pretty much the perfect match. 


- Main event time, as it's the 2000 Royal Rumble match. This definitely doesn't rank too highly in the history of Rumble matches, and most of it was pretty forgettable. The early comedy spot involving Rikishi and Too Cool was fun, and the first couple of Kaientai run-ins were also entertaining, though it got much less fun after Taka broke his damn face open. Most of the rest of the match was dull, with a surprise appearance from Bob Backlund that didn't really go anywhere, and Chris Jericho getting a massive pop for his second appearance of the night. The winner of this match is obvious, with The Rock just burying everyone else in a terrific pre-match promo that left no doubt as to his pending victory. Former partners Kane and X-Pac get to go at it, though the crowd doesn't really care, before Rock and Big Show are left as the final two. Rock really can't get much out of Show, as they try to put together a mini-match at the end, before Show tries to score the elimination, but Rock hangs on to the top rope and Show is sent to the floor. There was never any doubt of this result, though the final elimination was actually botched, as both of Rock's feet clearly touched the floor first, which isn't caught on camera. Though that botch was unfortunate, it played perfectly into a storyline between the two, which we'll see more about next time. The Rock was the right winner, but the match was only ever mediocre at best. 


7/10


A match as good as the WWF title Street Fight could always carry any show to a good rating from me, but there's more to enjoy here. The tag team tables match was bonkers and Tazz's debut was a big moment that unfortunately didn't lead to much for him. Yeah, the Rumble match wasn't great, but both it and most everything else on the show did have redeeming qualities, except for the swimsuit contest, that was hot garbage. 


Next time on Henry's Pay-Per-View Reviews: No Way Out 2000. See you soon. 


- Henry

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